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ADHD????-TANIA'S STORY
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As someone who has studied ADHD a little while in high school and college, I would say “Oh! It sounds like everyone has problems with concentration, but I guess it must be a lot worse for people with ADHD.” I would then proceed to reminisce about the times I have seen little boys and girls that would not listen when being talked to and would compulsively choose to stand up, run around, and break things against their parents’ wishes. Then, I would think, “How difficult must it be for someone like that to be successful in their education and career lives?” Very difficult. They would probably give up on their education even before getting to college.
These sad thoughts briefly cycled in my mind while studying, but I never thought that I would be the one with this condition. I was 20 years old when I sat in my college dorm room, crying my heart out because I had received my very first F in a course in the previous semester. I am worth nothing. I am stupid. My family is right. How did I ever make it to college? I should’ve just gone to the military like they suggested! What happened to me? I had a 4.0 GPA in high school! Everyone is looking up to me and I have failed miserably!
A few months later, as I sit in a counseling session, I tell my therapist about something that I learned in my Cognitive Neuroscience class about people with ADHD. “I think I just did that yesterday before the test! I procrastinated so much that I only had 5 hours left to study for the test and I hyper-focused for the rest of the time!” Then, it clicked in her mind, “It sounds like she has all the symptoms of ADHD.” Slowly but surely she was making a list of all the symptoms I have and, a few weeks later: “Tania, I think you have to get tested for ADHD.”
Her words sank in as I made appointments and arrangements and, on April 22nd, 2010, I was diagnosed with ADHD - Inattentive type. I read as much as I could about the learning disorder and had dozens of meetings with deans, academic service counselors, and disability service staff in order to get organized and get any accommodations I would need for the next semester, but my diagnosis sadly came too late as my grades were already suffering and so was I. Therefore, I took a year off of college (which is more common than I thought it would be) in order to begin to gain more discipline and organize myself more as is critical for a person with my condition. Also, getting the right medication was also difficult as everyone's body is different.
As of today, I do not feel that I have controlled my ADHD like I want to. I am a perfectionist, so there are times that I have dealt harshly with myself. I have cried because I have left a shopping bag in the mall (even though I found it quickly) and have worried, “What if that were my child?” However, there are always ways to get around the symptoms and just be who you want to be. There are always ways to make your symptoms work for you and even make things you have to deal with interesting enough for you to focus on them. As people with ADHD, we have a great imagination that allows us to study and think in innovative ways. Who created Jet Blue? Who created the electronic airplane ticket? Who is Michael Phelps? Who is Justin Timberlake? Who is Will Smith (who got a perfect score on the SATs by the way)? All people with ADHD. I am not who they say I am. I am not irresponsible, lazy, stupid, or just plain bad. I just have ADHD and that will not stop me from gaining the success I will soon have.
These sad thoughts briefly cycled in my mind while studying, but I never thought that I would be the one with this condition. I was 20 years old when I sat in my college dorm room, crying my heart out because I had received my very first F in a course in the previous semester. I am worth nothing. I am stupid. My family is right. How did I ever make it to college? I should’ve just gone to the military like they suggested! What happened to me? I had a 4.0 GPA in high school! Everyone is looking up to me and I have failed miserably!
A few months later, as I sit in a counseling session, I tell my therapist about something that I learned in my Cognitive Neuroscience class about people with ADHD. “I think I just did that yesterday before the test! I procrastinated so much that I only had 5 hours left to study for the test and I hyper-focused for the rest of the time!” Then, it clicked in her mind, “It sounds like she has all the symptoms of ADHD.” Slowly but surely she was making a list of all the symptoms I have and, a few weeks later: “Tania, I think you have to get tested for ADHD.”
Her words sank in as I made appointments and arrangements and, on April 22nd, 2010, I was diagnosed with ADHD - Inattentive type. I read as much as I could about the learning disorder and had dozens of meetings with deans, academic service counselors, and disability service staff in order to get organized and get any accommodations I would need for the next semester, but my diagnosis sadly came too late as my grades were already suffering and so was I. Therefore, I took a year off of college (which is more common than I thought it would be) in order to begin to gain more discipline and organize myself more as is critical for a person with my condition. Also, getting the right medication was also difficult as everyone's body is different.
As of today, I do not feel that I have controlled my ADHD like I want to. I am a perfectionist, so there are times that I have dealt harshly with myself. I have cried because I have left a shopping bag in the mall (even though I found it quickly) and have worried, “What if that were my child?” However, there are always ways to get around the symptoms and just be who you want to be. There are always ways to make your symptoms work for you and even make things you have to deal with interesting enough for you to focus on them. As people with ADHD, we have a great imagination that allows us to study and think in innovative ways. Who created Jet Blue? Who created the electronic airplane ticket? Who is Michael Phelps? Who is Justin Timberlake? Who is Will Smith (who got a perfect score on the SATs by the way)? All people with ADHD. I am not who they say I am. I am not irresponsible, lazy, stupid, or just plain bad. I just have ADHD and that will not stop me from gaining the success I will soon have.
